Quorn, How Do I Love Thee?

I had a great dinner Friday night and, as I was preparing it and getting excited about it, I decided to blog about it. Why? Not because it was beautifully plated (not at all... the method was "dump from pan into bowl"). Not because it featured exotic or expensive ingredients (all came from my local supermarket and fit well within my student budget).


No, I feel it worthy of inclusion in the blog because the star ingredient was Quorn.


I love Quorn. And I am tired of acquaintances (it's been a few over the years) who have never even tried Quorn mocking me for eating a fake food made from fungus.

Even though I'm not a vegetarian, I'm not a big meat eater and I'm also kind of lazy. I'm also not good at planning meals ahead allowing time for frozen meat to thaw. Although I am in the 1% of the American population that likes tofu (really), ironically I am also in the 1% of the American population that shouldn't eat soy (in my case, not because of an allergy, but because some studies suggest that the phytoestrogens in soy might fuel my particular kind of cancer, and if there are any lone wolf cancer cells left in my body, I don't want to give them a Happy Meal, ya know?). Tempeh doesn't agree with me and TVP tastes to me like, well, an acronym rather than a food.

I happened upon Quorn a few years ago, right after it was introduced in the U.S., at the health food supermarket where I used to work. I was so excited to find a meat-free product that wasn't soy, was low-fat, low cholesterol and tasty. I've tried most of the Quorn products, but the only one I really like and buy is the "Naked Chik'nCutlet." It looks vaguely like a chicken breast.

Quorn is made from mycoprotein, a fungus. Before you go "eeeeeew," think of the mold in blue cheese, the live bacteria in good yogurt, the turd-like things pigs dig up and farmers sell for hundreds of bucks (aka truffles), and the "noble rot" that makes some wines so desirable. Yes, we humans eat and esteem a lot of weird things, so don't pick on my beloved Quorn just because it comes from the fungi kingdom.

Friday night, I sauteed some shallots and fresh garlic in a bit of olive oil, added a sliced Quorn Naked Chik'n Cutlet and some fresh broccoli that I cut into bite-size pieces. A drizzle of organic chicken stock let the broccoli steam a bit, and also gave the Quorn a nice moist meatiness. Meanwhile, I boiled half a cup of mushroom tortellini from Trader Joe's, tossed it all together once the pasta was done and added a tablespoon of Vermont Butter and Cheese Company quark. For those of you who haven't tried it, I highly recommend quark, a German style soft cheese, as a lower calorie, lower fat substitute for ... well, there really is nothing like quark. It's sort of cream cheese texture but with a creme fraiche taste. In a word, yummy.

I sprinkled on some chopped fresh parsley and voila... a satisfying, meat-free, soy-free meal with tons of taste.

As you can see from the photo below, I was not the only one excited about this Quorn-tastic meal. Wiley is a real Quorndog.